I just can’t get enough breakfast stuff at the moment! As someone who has been vegetarian pretty much since I could chew, and never really been into faux meats, this seems like a strange thing for me to make. Actual meat smells makes me want to be violently ill. Even the smell of milk makes me dry retch so badly that the strictest rule in our house is to keep it the hell away from me – Willow and Damion sometimes have raw dairy milk – God help them if they don’t clean their glasses straight away! But, dark confession I must make, the smell of cooking bacon is rather pleasant to my olfactories. I don’t know why, maybe it’s the saltiness. I could never eat it. So I’m not sure what compelled me to come up with this one. Maybe I’m just bored. Anyway, who cares, here’s the recipe. Enjoy.
Love love,
Ames X


  • Beetroots
  • Maple syrup
  • Sea or Himalayan salt
  • Smoked paprika
  • Olive oil


  1. Mix together everything except the beetroot in the quantities that most please you.
  2. Peel the beetroots so that they are free of dirt and those funny little hairy bits they seem to have.
  3. Using a vege peeler (or paring knife if you posess incredible knife skills), slowly peel as long and thick a piece of beetroot as you can. Make as many as you want, remembering that they will shrink a lot once dehydrated.
  4. Marinate in your maple mix, and lay out on lined dehydrator sheets. Dehydrate until crispy.